TGBKA, Days 22 - 29: More Passport Fun

Remember Day 6, my no-fee passport apppointment? That was the day Sweet Baboo and I decided to file for our tourist passports. I didn't trust that our no-fee passport applications would get back to me in time, or that they were even filled out properly. So I spent Day 7 getting Sweet Baboo to get me the proper paperwork from him (he needed to send me the DS-3053: Statement of Consent since he wouldn't be there to give consent in person). $524.50 later (including expedite fees for each of our passports), we were able to file the applications at the post office quickly and with relatively few headaches.

I say relatively few because at least those headaches were absolutely excusable, or my own fault. First, I had to go to two post offices (on opposite sides of town) because the first one wasn't doing passports that day. Apparently, the employee who does them at that location fell ill. Okay, no problem. I went to the other passport office. When I made it to the other passport office, there was no line... no waiting! I walked right up, and the lady looked over my paperwork. I had everything... except for a printout of Sweet Baboo's military ID card. That needed to accompany the DS-3053. Of course, the post office didn't have any printers that I could use (he emailed me a scanned copy of his ID card for a different PCS duty of mine) so I had to head over to the local Staples to pay for copies. It was quicker than driving the 20 minutes back home (and then the 20 more minutes back to the post office) to print it out. When I got back to the post office there was, of course, a long line of people wanting to get passports.

When I finally got to the front of the line, the passport lady looked over all of our documents again and told me that one of my documents wouldn't be accepted. It was the court decree for my legal name change. You see in 2012, for reasons I'll discuss in a different blog post, I legally changed my name. I didn't get divorced; I didn't remarry. I just had had enough of my legal name and asked the probate judge to legally change it. He did, and something inside of me got brighter that day. But I digress. I had the court decree, but had to hand it over to Passport Lady on post for my official no-fee passports. She assured me that a photocopy of the same document would be acceptable for the tourist passports, and even made the copies for me. Post Office Passport Lady didn't think the photocopy version would fly. She made a phone call to the State Department and came back saying that they would, in fact, accept it. So we sent all of the paperwork in.

On Day 22, I got a letter from the Department of State saying this:

"Please submit a certified copy of the court ordered name change. Photocopies and notarized copies of these documents are not accepted for passport services."

Well dang.

Post-yoga: Welcome to my Namaste Hair. But this has (unfortunately) been my "yoga or not look" for the past 20 days.

There was a 1-800 number on the letter for me to use should I have any questions. I got the letter after 6pm on Friday before a federal holiday. I was just sure that I wouldn't get anywhere with the issue until the following Tuesday. I should have made the call right away. Turns out the State Department takes calls at all hours of the day or night! On Day 26 I called the 800 number and explained the situation. The nice fellah at the other end of the line told me that only original certified copies are accepted. I told him that the original is with my application for the no-fee passport... couldn't he just walk over to that department and check it out? He chuckled, but not in a condescending manner. He explained that "that department" is in a completely different state... so the walk would take a while. He recommended that since I'm still in the county that I got the name changed, I head over to the probate judge's office and ask for another certified copy and send it in. So I did.

Man, is our probate judge's office amazing! I think I'm going to spend my Sunday making something tasty and equally amazing to take back up to that office to give to the employees there. They were kind, informative, understanding, and one employee had a hug to give me when I told her that I was overly stressed, excessively caffeinated, and severely under rested. Within five minutes I had two fresh certified copies of my court decree, and a smile on my face. I wished the entire office a wonderfully blessed rest of their week, and headed out the door. Fabulous! I went directly home and mailed one of the certified copies to the Department of State. And then I waited.

So today... Day 29... I watched with excitement when our mail carrier approached the door with two priority mail envelopes. I just sent out my certified copy of the court decree two days ago, so I knew my passport wasn't in one of those envelopes. They had to the be envelopes for the girls. They were! But no passports were inside. Instead, I got two (almost) identical letters telling me that I needed to send the original DS-3053 that Sweet Baboo filled out. He scanned and emailed the forms to me because he wouldn't be able to get them in the mail, and in my hands in enough time for me to get them in the applications and on the way to the State Department with enough time for them to process the applications and send the passports back to me before we had to leave for Korea. (Whew! Run-on sentence, anybody?). The letters got to me at 5:03pm my time. I decided to call the 800 number anyway. Amazingly, I didn't get a message telling me to call back during business hours! Rather, I got a very friendly woman (Susan) on the phone who spent the next 40 minutes helping me with the girls' applications as well as mine. Then she went through the system and "linked" our applications so that they would all be processed together.

She made notes in the system about the situation, asked several questions that were pertinent and relevant, and then asked if she could call me back in about ten minutes. Impressed to find a federal employee who cares and was willing to do more than just point me elsewhere, I was giddy with excitement. After we hung up, I was visualizing becoming BFFs with this sweet lady. We would have mimosas during Sunday brunch, we would take girls-only weekend getaways annually, we would do the things BFFs do. All because for the first time since we got orders to Korea, I had a person who was going out of her way to ensure this would be the very last speed bump in the passport process for me. I felt like I was the second grader on the playground who was getting picked on by other passport people, and Susan was my big sister who could beat them all up. People, PCS-ing is stressful. It is not for the faint of heart when you have your service member there to help. It's really no joke when you're the only person handling it all.

Susan called back and recommended that I fill out the DS-5525 and overnight it to the State Department. This form is the Statement of Exigent/Special Family Circumstances.

I got off the phone with Susan feeling confident that once I turned in the DS-5525, we would be well on our way to passport-ownership. The post offices were closed, so I could put off filling out the form and sending it in until tomorrow morning. The girls had been so good this week as I navigated very frustrating waters, and our housing office was hosting a Resident Appreciation Week. Tonight was the last night of appreciating us, and they were celebrating by hosting a small fall festival. Pony rides, pumpkin painting, BBQ, bouncy house... the girls would get some good entertainment and I didn't have to cook dinner. Double win!

It was a beautiful evening for outdoor activities. I was glad to step away from the PCS craziness for a bit.

The Wee loved riding Mystery. He was a gentle horse who handled her clumsy mount and dismount gracefully.

The Elder's horse seemed to be very happy to be there. Despite not wanting to walk any more.

Eventually he got moving again. And the Elder enjoyed her ride as well.

The BBQ was lovely. The girls were debating whether the object in the air was a rocket, an airplane, a meteor, or a falling star.

The Wee decided to not take any chances... she would "pray on her falling star" just in case.

The bouncy house was a big hit... until the Wee got a big hit in her face. A fat lip later, we went home.

Wanna know how I know that the State Department has people who tend the phone at all hours of the day? Because I got a phone call from Sharon at 9:04 pm! She called because she was trying to finish up our passports and wanted to know more about the exigent circumstances for the Wee. I explained the situation to her again, and added that the circumstances were the same for the Elder as well. She looked into both cases and ended up telling me that she would go ahead and process the passport applications without the Form 5525. The passports would be good for one year. My immediate thought: In one year, I'd have to fork out another $525 in fees to get the passports updated again. She assured me that I wouldn't have to pay another $525. The one year expiration date is given to allow me enough time to get to Korea, get Sweet Baboo to fill out the DS-3053, and send everything in all over again so we can get the 5 year passports. WHEW! Sharon was quickly moving to the State Department BFF list.

She asked if I had any setbacks in my own passport and I told her that it should be rectified since I turned in a certified copy of the court decree days ago. She looked into it, asked me more questions, typed a bunch of stuff in the computer, and told me that they didn't have the certified copy just yet. Not wanting to lose hope, I told her that I would check back in next week to see if it had arrived. I heard more typing, then she asked if she could call me back. When she did, she gave me the great news: they would process my passport now.

Despite the overly frustrating trip to the DEERS office, today was a GLORIOUS day. I needed today.

TGBKA, Day 6: Passport Lady, Take 3!

The day came for us to go back to the passport office to finalize the process of applying for our Official Passports. Now, I do my best to have "average expectations", but Sweet Baboo is constantly telling me that my expectations (of both myself and of others) is far too high. You be the judge here:

When we arrived, Passport Lady greeted my children (ages 5 and 9 years old) by saying, "Okay, you can't come back here making a lot of noise. I have a lot of paperwork to do and need it quiet so we can focus." Up to this point, the girls had quite literally said nothing. Not one word was spoken out of either of their mouths because they had nothing to say. I, on the other hand, was gently (and in my "I'm in a working office" voice) guiding them to where they needed to go. When she started the visit with that greeting, I looked at her with my obvious, "Are you f-ing kidding me? Did you really just speak at my kids that way?" facial expression and she jumped to explain herself: 

Passport Lady: "There is a lot of paperwork, and I wanted to make sure they knew to keep it down."

Me: "I'm sure they'll be fine. I have good kids."

Passport Lady: "Do they have coloring books and toys to keep them occupied?"

Me: "Nope."

Passport Lady: "What? You didn't bring coloring books and toys?! Why not?"

Me: "I wasn't told to. Is it a requirement?"

Passport Lady: "Well how are they going to stay occupied?"

Me: "I have good kids. I'm sure they'll be fine."

Passport Lady: "It's going to be, like, 45 minutes! Fine."

*For the record, we were there for 2 hours and not once did I have to tell them to behave.* 

We got started with the paperwork, and right away I had questions for her. She wanted to put in the application that we didn't already have passports. But I did. They were expired, but I had them. She said that since they are expired, I needed to put in that I don't have one. But we ended up turning in the passports that I just said on the application that I don't have as one of the official forms of identification.

Despite the several times I told her that The Elder and I had Official Passports (which were expired), and the The Wee never had an Official Passport, Passport Lady kept asking to see my no-fee passports. I would pick up mine and The Elder's passports and hand them to her, explaining that those were the no-fee ones. But they had blue jackets on them. Which apparently, in the eyes of Passport Lady, meant that they simply could not be no-fee passports. Despite the fact that the instructions for the no-fee passport was clearly printed in the correct spot at the back of the book. She still wouldn't listen.

She typed with her index fingers. And she looked for the keys as she typed. This slowed down the process substantially since I had to wait for her to ask me for the information, and she had to search for the keys to type it in. I'm surprised that with the über-technological way we live, employers don't have an expectation that the employees they hire have, and maintain, a minimum typing skills assessment if their main duties in the workplace require that they use a computer. At the risk of judging her by her age (she started it with the way she spoke to and about my children), I'm sure she has been working in that office since typewriters were a luxury. But that doesn't excuse her from being able to provide services efficiently and effectively. 

At one point she stopped her painfully slow typing, turned to me, and said, "You're really lucky. I don't do this for anybody." F-bombs were being swallowed at this point. I didn't mind doing this paperwork at home. In fact, it would probably have been more efficient and it definitely would have been easier on the girls. They can handle boring errands, but they find ugliness very difficult to understand. The paperwork that she so generously filled out "for me" that day was online, via the State Department's website. It wasn't some super secret form. I just needed to know where to find it and I could have done it myself. But she insisted that she do it for me during our appointment. 

When it came time to sign the applications for the girls, I was told to give a copy of the POA that Sweet Baboo gave me so I could sign for him. I thought this was odd; can a POA authorize me to get my kids a passport? My mind went through all of the ugly things I've watched wives to do their husbands with a POA in their hands: cleaned out bank accounts, changed names on vehicle titles, take out big loans, etc. Then my mind raced through every creepy Lifetime Original Movie where one parent goes behind the other parent's back and runs off with the kids. No forwarding address... no way to figure out where they went. A passport would allow me to do just that, on an international level. Wouldn't our State Department have safeguards in place to keep things like that from happening?

Turns out, they do. But Passport Lady either didn't know about them, or she didn't want to bother with them. Either way, I find it hard to believe that she is still employed at her job because she really offered me no actual assistance of value throughout the entire process. The DS-3053, Statement of Consent Application Form, needs to be filled out and notarized by the non-attending parent(s) for a child under the age of 16 to get a passport. I learned that when I went to the post office to apply for our tourist passports. And for Sweet Baboo to get me the DS-3053, he had to hunt down a JAG Officer in the final hour of the duty day just before a Korean holiday. Then he had to scan and email it to me. But that happened for Day 8: Tourist Passports... because Passport Lady either didn't know that I needed it, or didn't care to bring it up. And when I did sign my name, she stopped and dramatically said, "That is your signature?"

Me: "Yes. Why?"

Passport Lady: "Really? That's how you sign your name?"

Me: "Do you want me to prove it? I have that same signature on three picture IDs."

Passport Lady: ~grunt~

After everything was signed, and I was just about to walk out of her office, I asked her how long the expedited process will take. She looked at me funny, and I reminded her that on Day 4 I mentioned possibly needing the passports to be expedited because 6-8 weeks would be cutting it really close. She said, "where's your memo signed by a 4-Star General?" Wait. What? Apparently, I need a General to approve applying for an expedited no-fee, and when I asked her about the expediting process two days earlier she failed to mention that. The list of information that I was lacking, despite my best efforts to gather it, was growing by the minute. 

So needless to say, I am not even sure I'll be getting my no-fee passports in time. They will process in 6-8 weeks. That would put them to me between Day 48 and Day 62... if they are even approved. Stressed, I told Sweet Baboo what happened. We decided that I would file for our tourist passports, and spend the money to get them expedited. This should be fun...

The Great Big Korean Adventure, Day 4: Passport Lady, Take 2

For those of you following along, Day 4 has already been a day full of stress and disappointment. Passport Lady was less than helpful when I went into the office, and I last left you with the teaser information about emails being sent between the two of us. Here was my attempt to change my vinegar to honey:

Ms. [Passport Lady],

I came into the Passport Office about an hour ago. I was a frazzled mess and very stressed out. I'm sorry that I projected that upon you. I was disappointed in myself to find that I had come in during your lunch time, and didn't want to interrupt your lunch any further. After stepping away from the situation, calming my stress down, and looking at that scene from the outside, I realize that the way I spoke with you was not the way I was intending. Please accept my apologies; I am very sorry for being short with you.

Every time we PCS to a new duty station, we play the PCS Shuffle: we get told that we have an insane amount of things to accomplish in an impossible amount of time to do it. We show up to an office to check something off of our list, get told a handful of information and are sent on our way. When we return, having accomplished the handful of information we are generally told that we have still more to do before we can get helped. My husband is currently in Korea, so I am handling this entire process by myself. I am tired and overwhelmed already, and I have only been handling this move since Friday. 

I was in the passport office about a month or so ago. I cannot recall who the person sitting at the front desk was, but she handed me the "Obtaining an Official Government Passport" paper that you referenced. She told me that I needed to work on the DD Form 156, bring in the expired passports, and just come back in. I asked about the other forms listed, and was told that we could take care of it in the office. I'll work on the other forms listed, but I do have the DD Form 156 filled out and ready to move forward.

At this point, I have 60 days (starting last Thursday) to get to Korea. To say that I'm in a rush, and frantically trying to gather all of the pertinent information and documents in the most efficient way possible is an understatement. I am kind of running blind as I navigate these OCONUS PCS waters right now, and am trying to schedule my life according to how long things will take to complete. Since the passports will take a while, I would like to complete this ASAP. Can you please spell it all out for me? I would really appreciate it.

Just under an hour later, she wrote back. My desktop computer was at the Apple Store, getting looked at for a few annoying habits it picked up that I needed removed. Better to take care of it now, with an Apple Store just off post, than later when we're in Korea. With my desktop "in the shop", so to speak, I needed to find a place I could use to print the DD-1056 and DS-11 forms that I was originally told would be taken care of when I came into the office with orders in hand. These forms are packets, so running to Staples to print them out would have been a last resort. The library on post was (in perfect unison with the way the day was going for me already) closed for yet another remodeling situation. And I vaguely remember Sweet Baboo's old boss telling me that if I needed anything to simply swing by and let them know. So I did. And when the last page of the final packet of papers popped out of Big Boss' printer, Passport Lady's email came through:

Thank-you for the sweet note. I know you are exhausted in this process which can be daunting at times....don't worry....I will help you all I can.

So.....your husband is in S. Korea now.....and you & your 2 daughters are to PCS to join him...right?

OK...first thing...we need his orders stating you and the children are authorized to go.  Then we start with who has what paperwork....do you (or the children) have a blue PP now?  If not....we will need a birth certificate for each of you.  then we will need the DD-1056 ( I can take care of that )....we will also need a DS-11 for each person who does not have a RED official passport now.

If you want, we can do all this in my office one day when I do not have any appointments, we can knock it out in about 45 minutes...I take the pictures, and can do most of your paperwork.
Let me know if this is OK with you?

Being, literally, a block and a half away from the Passport Office, I decided to pop in and see about getting an appointment. The first time I was in the Passport Office, I was led to believe that I didn't need an appointment. "When you get the forms together, just come on in and we'll take care of you." The wording on Passport Lady's email didn't say that I needed an appointment, but I didn't feel like I had the spare time to head on in to her office "...when [she does] not have any appointments...". Plus, she made herself perfectly clear earlier that day that she works by appointments only. And I really do not enjoy being on the phone. So rather than run the risk of playing voicemail tag, or being on hold, I opted to pop in to sort things out in person.

When I arrived, Passport Lady had a bucket of papers in her hands that she was taking to a set of large garbage cans in the lobby area. She was walking by as I came in. The very first thing she said to me was, "I didn't mean I could do it right now." She gave nervous look to me, and I took that as her attempts to be funny. I gave a nervous chuckle (she is the only person on post who can help me with this, so I opted to be as nice as humanly possible and just get the job done), and responded with, "Well, your email didn't specify when you don't have any appointments. So I came in to set one up." After she finished with the papers in her hand, she came over to me to discuss the next steps.

I showed her all of the passports I have between the girls and me. The Elder and I have both No-Fee Passports and Tourist Passports. The Wee only got the Tourist Passport. But all of the passports, regardless of the type of passports, had blue jackets. I felt it was important to let her know about this because Sweet Baboo and I thought it odd that our Official Passports didn't come in red jackets (like so many of our friends'. Plus, she had referred to the different colored jackets in her email to me, and I wanted to make sure that she understood that while I didn't have any red jacket passports, I did have Official Passports for 2/3 of us. More on that later.

After showing her the rest of my paperwork, and letting her know that I had just printed out the rest of the documents that I was told would be handled when I came in to get the photos taken, she told me to not worry about those forms; she would take care of them when I came in. I asked several times when I could come in, stressing to her that time was very short and I would probably need expedited passports to ensure everything came in on time. She pulled out her calendar and we made an appointment for the girls and me to come in on the morning of Day 6 of our PCS process. She told me that the appointment would last approximately 45 minutes, and to come ready for photos. I asked her if I needed to bring anything else for the appointment and was assured that I had everything I needed.

While I was there, I made an appointment to see a Household Goods (HHG) counselor so I could schedule my pack out dates. Even though I'm not moving during "PCS Season", I wanted to make sure I could lock in the appropriate dates for a smooth PCS. As luck would have it, there was an opening after lunch on Day 6. We could knock out the passports, grab a quick bite to eat, then come back to the same place and bang out HHG. Things were starting to look up.

The next day, on Day 5, the girls and I got started with "The Great Purging". Starting in the Triathlon Room, and moving to the Laundry Room, we grabbed big white trash bags and labeled them: DONATE and TRASH. The Triathlon Room has a wall of shelves built in, so we labeled them with HHG/UB, DONATE/SELL, and NTS. By the end of the day, we had taken 5 garbage bags of donations to the van, 3 bags of trash to the curb, and the Triathlon Room was tidy. For the first time in years, I can walk in that room without stubbing my toe, tripping, or having to kick things out of the way. PCS' are fantastic at making sure you don't become a packrat for too long... but more on that later.

The Great Big Korean Adventure, Day 4: The Passport Office

Ah, the Passport Office on post. I remember the Passport Office at Fort Carson being super helpful, and very understanding with the difficulties that come with an OCONUS PCS with small children. He was an expert in his field, knowing exactly how the paperwork needed to be filled out under every circumstance. He explained every step, and even (gasp) gave us a checklist so we wouldn't forget to bring an important piece of information. I was amazed that he held all of the knowledge of what the State Department needed without looking up every detail. His response? "Ma'am, it's my job. The only thing I do for 40 hours a week is help people get their Official Passports. If I don't know the regulations, why would I continue to have a job?" I mistakenly assumed that our Passport Office would be the same way.

When Sweet Baboo was prepping for his PCS to Korea, I heard him grumbling about the Passport Office here. A chorus of other people chimed in with the grumblings. Through my rose colored glasses, I was simply sure of the fact that it couldn't be that bad. But it was. Oh, was it bad.

The week I sent all of our Command Sponsorship Exception to Policy paperwork to Sweet Baboo, I went to the Passport Office on post to gather information about getting our Official No-Fee Passports updated. I was given a sheet of paper and told that I had to wait until the CS got approved before I could move forward. At least I got the sheet of paper, right?

A few weeks later, on Day 4 (Monday), I went into the Passport Office with my super-organized PCS Notebook and all of the necessary documents. I was so proud of myself for having the forethought to stop by the place weeks earlier so I didn't waste my time or have to ping-pong back and forth to go fetch more paperwork. The girls dressed themselves, in their sparkliest outfits and were excited to check another block off our list. When we got there, however, our fire fizzled.